Evidence of De-evolution in Pacifica

I live in Pacifica, on the coast of California, just south of San Francisco. We call it, "Berkeley West". It's impossible to describe the depth of nuttiness that passes for political thinking here. The usual terms 'nutroots', 'moonbats' and 'unhinged' woefully understate the disease.

I don't usually write about local issues or people because they aren't of general interest. But in my little local paper last week there were two examples of such deep derangement, such mystic insanity, such cosmic ignorance, that I just had to share. As will be immediately obvious, my comments are in red. I meant to post the letters without commentary. I discovered it was physically impossible.

And now, I give you two citizens of Pacifica, California—who nevertheless sound like they came from another dimension where the process of reasoning hasn't been invented yet and no large mammals have opposable thumbs:

First, meet Mary H. , who has the understanding of international affairs, human nature, history, justice, liberty, and democracy of a toddler. Be afraid, be very afraid. This person probably votes in elections that determine your future:

Dear Editor:
There are angry, maimed, devastated people on both sides of the conflict in Israel/Lebanon. People in the world community need to demand an end to the violence, the lawlessness and all the horrors of war. [Hey, good idea, why haven't we tried THAT before! TG]

I understand those millions of us who marched and demonstrated in 2003, before the war in Iraq, could understandably feel powerless to affect (sic) the changes needed when the war mongers [Does she mean Fez-Boo-Laah* and Ham-Ass* who continue to target, main and kill innocent Iraelis, or Saddam Hussein who slaughtered millions of his own people, or Iran who invented, exports and supports world-wide jihadism and terror? But no! She means those murderous thugs Bush, Cheney, Blair and Howard. TG] didn't listen to us and went to war anyway. Let's face it, we have a government, and there are other national governments too, who don't think that ordinary people are worth anything at all. [Ok, I'm officially shocked, a moonbat admits there are other governments in the world that are almost as bad as America's. The ACLU and Amnesty International are going to revoke her memberships, even if she is talking about the UK, Australia and Italy. TG] They think we're just lumps of flesh that they don't want to recognize as human beings. [Hey! Same mind-set as the pro-abortion fanatics! Isn't this a good thing? TG]

We need to stand up together thoughout the world and shout, 'Stop the Wars!' [Why are they always shouting? Do they think that works? Didn't she just say that millions of shouting protestors had no effect on the choice to go to war? Does she think we could have avoided WWII or prevented the Holocaust, or Japan's rape of China and the Phillipines, or the Taliban's infamous oppression of Afghanistan if we'd just SHOUTED LOUDLY ENOUGH? TG] We need to demand of our political representatives that they work for an end to all wars and a rational design for world unification. The design already exists, it only needs ratification. [I know this is an insignificant quibble, but if the design already exists, why must our representatives work on one? (The lack of internal logic is driving me crazy, making me petty and mean.) TG]

To the person who said in a letter, 'I hope the Israelis have them for lunch,' (meaning Hezbollah and Hamas), the Lebanese have been continuously attacked [Sweet Sissy Muhammad in Lace Undies! She can't have not noticed that for 60-odd years the ISRAELIS have been continuously attacked by these very assholes. Can she? TG] and certainly also have a right to defend themselves. [When you shoot the guy who busts into your house with a gun, does he have the "right" to defend himself? And Mary, if you're reading this: In this analogy, the Israelis are the homeowners and H&H are the home-invaders. You're welcome.TG]

I believe that all involved are in the wrong [By that logic, if a guy tries to rape you and you hit him, you're BOTH in the wrong. TG] and war, especially continuous war, is not the way to right the wrongs. [Actually, if you kill enough of the bad guys, it's quite effective. TG] Only honest diplomacy, negotiation, [Yes, North Korea and Saddam Hussein, Iran and--dare I say it--Hitler, are fine examples of the success of toothless diplomacy. TG], and the rule of law (international police force?) can right the wrongs. [They're worried about jack-boots from Bush-land, but she's OK with an international armed police force controlled by the hideous reprobates of the United Nations, stalking the country, arresting people, with no U.S. Constitutional oversight. Aaaaaacccckkkk! My head is exploding!

Would it be too presumptous of me to speculate that in her One World Government paradise, all individual citizens will be disarmed--in the interests of peace? TG]

Since we have no world federal government to oversee a world police action, the best we can do is to multilaterally work for a total and permanent cease fire immediately. [Has the history of the world passed this woman by entirely? Permanent cease-fire? Does she even KNOW any humans? TG] And then work for a democratic, federal world government that could substantiate (sic) police action." [I'm assuming that she believes the corruption, the money laundering, the skimming and outright theft, the graft, the greed, the anti-semitism, the anti-Americanism, the anti-liberty and democracy, the crime, the ambition, the profiteering, the genocide, the rape, the sexual child exploitation, the sex slavery and general hell-mouth that is the United Nations is a good model for her DFWG...where tyrants, genocidal maniacs, slave-traders, murderous theocrats and other sandbox players will get the same vote as (temporarily) free democratic societies. And run an police force with world-wide coersive powers. Now, THERE's a recipe for Utopia. TG]

[Signed] Mary H.

She actually wrote this, and boldly sent it off to the newspaper to be published (unless a very evil enemy is attempting to make her look like she wasn't actually born on the planet.) But all's well that ends well. She did science a favor, exposing so graphically the tragedy of a person afflicted with the dreaded Brain-Eating Fungus of Liberalism. The Centers for Disease Control can immediately get to work on a cure, and we can all wear ribbons in sympathy and solidarity.

* * * *
Next we have the interestingly named Forrest W. I'm not sure it's his real name, but I'm positive the actor who shares it didn't write this. Even Hollywood would balk at this stupendous boobery. It is a case study of Bush Derangement Syndrome. I'm submitting it to the Medical Journals as is. No further research or documentation is necessary.

Dear Editor:
Our society innocently and passively [We were all virgins on a date-rape drug? What does this mean? TG] drove over the cliff in the year 2001. Our corporate-cultivated indifference and apathy [It's not MY fault I'm indifferent and apathetic! TG] allowed a corrupt, incompetent [Note: Bush is incompetent. TG] oil businesman and his cronies to become our leaders who soon enflamed terrorism [until November of 2000, there were no Muslims, or Muslim terrorists. The Religion of Peace was founded that year to resist the evil imperialism of George W. Bush whose plan was to steal the oil from the passive, beneficent, peace-loving, free peoples of the Middle East and give it to his 'cronies'. All previous acts of terrorism are mental artifacts of the Bush Cabal Mind Control Serum introduced into the population via the water supply, creating the mass hallucination that there were Muslim terrorists dedicated to our destruction BEFORE George W. Bush stole the presidency. TG] to their benefit. [Tin-Foil-Hat Conspiracy alert! George Bush was responsible for and benefitted from 9/11! TG] Too slowly, many Americans have finally begun to wake up to realize that our criminal emperor[First Emperor Comparison alert!], and his regime, has (sic) perverted our democracy. [Unless I am mistaken, this sort of crackpotism began the night of the 2000 election. TG] They have long ago betrayed the public trust. Fool us twice, shame on us. [But, it's so EASY, who could resist? TG]

It may be too late to save what's left of our democracy from these ruthless, disgraceful authoritarian conservatives without conscience. Questioning their lies and crimes; their suicidal political, economic, military and environmental destructions brands us as unpatriotic or treasonous [Is anyone else hungering for the smallest example here...some merest whisp of evidence of this widespread horror? TG] How dare we declare that the emperor [Second Emperor Camparison alert!] has no clothes [Does he HAVE to engage this painful cliche?] Like the good Germans of the 1930's, [1st Hitler Comparison alert! TG] we are told to be allegiant (sic) to them or we're with the 'enemy'. [Do these scare quotes imply there is no real enemy...well, except the President? TG] To stay in power they masterfully manipulate [Note: Bush is an evil genius (cf "Bush is incompetent" above.) TG] and orchestrate our fear, ignorance and patriotism [This just means they're better at it than the Democrats. TG] Our founding fathers are rolling in their graves. [With laughter at this innanity. TG] Many historians and analysts [A name would be good. TG] who are convinced that our system is now irreversibly corrupt [George Bush has accomplished this single-handedly in only 6 years? He's not just an evil genius, he's a friggin' wizard. TG] and that currently only the Democrats, with their fingers in the dike, [Doesn't he mean in the dyke? (sorry) in the wind? TG] are holding back the rabid culture of corruption, [Whoops! Democratic Party talking point. TILT! TILT! game over! TG] conservatism [Rabid culture of 'conservatism'?...like patriotism, or Christianity, or marriage, or morals, or family values, or self-sufficiency, or personal responsibility, or financial prudence? Horrors! TG] and imperialism. [Communist agit-prop alert! TG] They [WHO?? TG] see the United States decaying from a budding democracy into fascism [2nd Hitler Comparison alert! TG] in less than 250 years. [Who, exactly is he blaming for this? Is he so Bush-Fixated that he's forgotten that for a good share of those years Democrats were in power? TG] They say, [WHO??? TG] 'Take pride, Germany only took 30 years!' [3rd Hitler Comparison alert! TG] We must step forward and support the nationwide event on Oct. 5 called 'The World Can't Wait' as a means to make a positive difference. For more information, visit www.worldcantwait.net and also talk with your friends, neighbors and loved ones. [Well, don't talk too loud, Bush's Imperial Guard may hang you for treason. TG]

[Signed] Forrest W.

So in a single letter to the editor, we have three Hilter-Bush Comparisons; two Emperor-Bush Comparisons; one accusation that Bush Is Incompetent; one accusation that Bush Is An Evil Genius; two conflicting implications that Bush is 1) an Immortal who's responsible for 250 years of cultural wreckage or, 2) a Superman able to take down the Republic single-handedly in 6 years; whole passels of unnamed experts, anonymous sources, unidentified crimes, undisclosed lies, undocumented corruption; the required generalized trashing of conservatives; one kool-aid drinkers Party talking point; and one old fashioned communist agit-prop.

(Oh, and by all means, check out the website. It's hilarious.)

Well, there you have it. This is what passes for political dialogue in Pacifica. These people are somehow able to function in society and presumably making a living. It's a friggin' miracle.

Pity me. I live here.

The Gunslinger

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